Once Upon A Time

Written by: PPT Divas/PPT Guys (PPT, really!)

Hey, welcome to another month's competition round wrap-up after a nice, long break in February. For those of you not familiar with this game, this is a story-telling competition between the Guys and Divas. One group gets four people to write up four parts of the story (sometimes even with intentional spelling mistakes to throw off the other team!), tacks on three extra names as red herrings, then sends them to the other group to guess who wrote what. Points are given to both teams- the guessing team, for guessing correctly, and the writing team, for completely incorrect guesses. Then the roles of each group switch (on a five-day basis) and it keeps going till the end of the month. :)

This month's (well, last month's) game consisted of twenty-four parts in six rounds (four parts per round). The Divas won December with 11-9, the Guys won January with 17-16, but this round...the Divas win again with a whopping 19-13- the guys again had a -5 point penalty for delay, but even if they didn't have it, the girls would still have won! For winning, the Divas received a button and a NP prize.

So congratulations to the girls for winning again. This game will be put at a hiatus for a while, but good luck to both groups if there will be a coming round in the future. For now, you guys can all read the story of the March game- something about day and night gone awry.

If you wish to visit the past games- click here for January, and click here for December.

So without further ado- the story! Please note that they are in their original state and are unedited. Just for kicks, try to guess who wrote which part. :D

ROUND ONE

Part 1 A scream pierced the silent air of the night. He woke up with a start. Ah, so it was just a dream. But something seemed wrong. Urgh...just the time for a nightmare, and I have a test tomorrow. What time is it? He checked his watch. 2:50 AM. Hey wait a second, I'm positive this is right- but why is it so bright in here? The lights aren't on... Glancing out the window, he was bewildered to see the bright sunlight at such an hour. But even more strange was the fact that he could see owls flying around, raccoons in the distance, and a couple of nightingales... But no signs of day. What the heck is going on here?!

Part 2 Huh? That’s odd, a brown owl is flying in my direction...Ah its going to crash into the window! Just as the brown owl was going to smash into the 10x10 pane of glass, it whole window just disappeared. At a closer glance Damien knew something was wrong...the owl seemed more like a giant ball of feathers than the regular small brown owls he has back home. Then he remembered he didn't exactly know where he was. "What’s the problem, sapien? Never seen a window disappear before or something? remarked the Owl. "You...you...you just talked?" stammered Damien. "You for one shouldn't be questioning the authority of us avian kind. One might question your upbringing.� sneered the Owl, "Wait a second, what’s the scent?" At that moment the Owl started sniffing Damien. "Ah Ha, I knew it your not from here, just wait till I tell *him*" smirked the Owl. Just as the Owl was flying off...

Part 3 As the owl flew off Damien sank back down into his bed. He tried convincing himself that this was all a dream, but he knew better. Though he was still unaware of what was going on he had an odd feeling that he knew this was coming. As a small child, Damien had listened to his Grandmother as she talked of "the others." She had never told anybody who, or what, 'the others' were but had always taught them of their ancient ways. He stared out the window as he remembered his Grandmother's words. "The others are dictated by a single leader. It watches over them with its staring blue eyes. It is said that one day, under his leadership, the others would cross over and return to this world." Back then Damien had always shrugged off his Grandmother's words. "Yeah right Grandma," He had always said playfully. "I bet you tried feeding Mom the same old story..." Damien's deep navy eyes blinked, bringing him back to the reality around him. Staring intently out into the bright night he grabbed his sneakers and carefully crept downstairs. Something was up, and he knew where he could get some answers... He slipped silently out the door and got his helmet from the garage...

Part 4 Damien had this thing for protective sports wear, he felt it could be used to accessorize any outfit. Every day he could be counted on to wear some sort of plastic on some semi-vulnerable body part. At least it was better than Kris, the kid from school who always wore the life jackets. It might have been something that would have made you seem at home in a crappy, 80s novelty rap group, but its hardly going to make Joan River's top 10 best dressed list. Damien always thought there was something strange about that Kris kid. Anyways, Wednesdays were usually designated for elbow pads and the occasional shin guard, but today he felt a strong hankering to grab his lucky helmet... even if it had never been the same since the accident.

Names to choose for Round One: Blk Mage, Christopher, coming2atvnearu, Qanda, ScottNak, the_dog_god, Yoshi Answers at the bottom of the page.

ROUND TWO

Part 5 The accident...Damien remembered it as clearly as if it had happened yesterday. It was August 14. He was walking down the street wearing his lucky helmet. He saw a shape in the sky. It grew bigger. And bigger. The shape got closer, and Damien realized that it was a giant flying poodle with fangs. It licked his helmet before he could do anything but stare at the poodle, and his helmet, his favorite helmet, turned...pink. Damien screamed and ran away. Yes...his helmet had never turned back to blue with green stripes and turquoise polka dots. Damien knew he'd have to get revenge, someday, somehow.

Part 6 Still thinking about the accident Damien made his way steadily down his street and started up the hill to the other side of town. While he was walking along at a persistent pace, Damien couldn’t help but look around him in amazement. It was fascinating, everything around him was acting as if it were the night, but it wasn't dark, so he could see everything. He could see all sorts of things he had never seen before. There were many different kinds of owls flying between the buildings and trees, and even mice scurrying around in people's gardens. Just then, Damien was suddenly pulled out of his thoughts as he tripped over something in his path. Sitting down where he fell Damien rubbed his knees, cursing himself for not wearing kneepads. He then turned around to see what he had tripped over...

Part 7 Damien wasn't surprised at all to see that it had been a large, overgrown tree root. Certainly there were enough trees in this awful place. No, more surprised was he to see an owl, no, not just any owl, but the owl that he had met the night before, stare at him, it's large eyes blinking disdainfully down at him. "So, Sapien. You've found you're way back, I see. He's not going to be very happy about this..." the owl said. Damien blinked up at the owl in confusion, still rubbing his sore knees. The owl gave a snobby 'hoot' as it realised the boy had no clue what he was talking about. But the owl's eyes were amused, Damien could tell, as it said the next thing on its mind. "You really are new here, aren't you? Well then, Sapien, listen to me, or you are never going to get out of here alive..."

Part 8 Damien listened closely, a cut on his knee dully throbbing with pain. He didn't bother asking if the owl had a bandage. No matter how strange this place was, he doubted very much that the birds here carried medical supplies. The owl grinned- Damien hadn't known owls could grin, so he was mildly shocked at this- and spoke, his (her?) voice filled with... something. Damien couldn't tell. Maybe a bit of urgency, but with some lazy happiness on the side. Though that didn't really make any sense, so he forcibly told his mind to shut up, and listened to the owl. "Great things will come of you, oh Damien of Earth." Ah, so it was mysticism in his/her voice. Damien of Earth blinked, then replied, his voice hushed as if he were talking to a great God or something, "I'm destined for great things? And how do you know my name? Er, I mean, how do you know my name, Oh- um. Great. Er. Owl Thing?" "You're not destined for anything, I made it up, my name's Linda, deary and you're wearing a nametag." Looking down, he realised that yes, there was, quite noticeably, a nametag clipped to his clothes that announced, in large green and pink letters, that his name was Damien, and that he was from the earth.

Names to choose from for Round Two: ...Alex, fzun, Jasujo, r4che1, Twizzler0171, tymaporer, xjox Answers at the bottom of the page.

ROUND THREE

Part 9 "So... Linda, huh? Are you a girl?" Damien asked. "No. I am a male owl. from where I come names are different from Planet earth." says the owl. Suddenly 4 boys and girls materialized from thin air. "we are from the same planet as Linda here," they say. "Hi, My name is Chriss." "My name is Benedictineopolis." "I am Leslier." "I am Pii." "Together we are the Solar Squad! We strive to beat terrorism and corruption throughout the solar system!" Long live the frying pan!

Part 10 Damien looked at the group. Eyes gaping and mouth open. "Uh... Okay then. Am I dreaming or something?" Leslier steps in and speaks in a stern voice, "No. We aren't a dream. Let me pinch you to show you. That is what you people do to confirm that it is not a dream correct?" Leslier pinches Damien with a great force and drew blood. "OW! OK OK. It's not a dream...", Damien mutters. I don't think I'm going to like Leslier...

Part 11 "Why won't you like me?" asked Leslier. "What?! But I never said. . . " exclaimed a very surprised Damien. "Oh, that's because Leslier can read minds," explained Pii. "Don't worry, he does that all of the time. You'll get used to it." No I won't. thought Damien. "Well, everyone else has," stated Leslier very matter of factly. "Now, about the problems in this area of the solar system. We are here to help." Pii, Benedictineopolis and Chriss nodded in agreement while Linda watched on.

Part 12 Damien felt rather intruded at this point, Damien did everything in his power to clear his mind, however, he kept thinking: Man, The Solar Squad? I've gone off my rocker, that's for sure. Gah! Quiet Damien! Stop thinking! "Yes, we are the Solar Squad! Together we strive to beat terrorism and corruption throughout the solar system!" the four shouted in unison. Damien was shocked at their quick reply. "We mostly speak through thought talk, a pity you can't communicate through it. Makes everything much easier" said Benedictineopolis. Hoping there was a better explanation than a group of four thought talking power rangers from outer space, Damien went on with them though, still hoping to wake up in his comfy bed again.

Names to choose from for Round Three: Christopher, Matt, Qanda, timkhj, ScottNak, sirclucky, Xil Answers at the bottom of the page.

ROUND FOUR

Part 13 Pii looked over at Damien and smiled sweetly. "You look a little confused, what's wrong?" she said stopping and looking at him, tilting her head to the side like a confused puppy. Damien stopped, not wanting to think but finding himself unable to stop. He took a deep breath and forced a smile onto his face. "I'm not confused at all, I'm just trying to enjoy the crazy, messed up ride I guess..." he said still forcing the smile onto his face and repeating Don't think, don't think, don't think over and over in his head. "Oh come on," Pii said enthusiastically, "There has to be something on your mind! I'll answer any question you ask me." Damien raised an eyebrow and a genuine smile crept across his face.

Part 14 "Well, I was wondering one thing..." Damien said. Pii looked excited. "What is it? What would you like to know?" Damien's eyes twinkled. "Well," he said, "why was it that just two weeks after my accident with that giant poodle, all of... THIS... happened?" Pii looked bewildered. "What p-p-poodle?" The rest of the Solar Squad gasped.

Part 15 "Err...you know, pink poodle and it's toy? Damien said, confused. The squad exchanged glances...Pii was not someone to go back on her word. "I said I would answer you. However, now is not a good time. You will know the true answer soon, but for now all I shall say is that the pink poodle and its toy have a lot more significance than you think. And I know you think it's a big significance." Suddenly, there was a loud beep, and a crazyfrog ringtone! "Oh no! That means there's trouble! Better get to the space-truck!" Jeez...these people aren't half weird! thought Damien. "I heard that!" called Chriss.

Part 16 All of a sudden, Damien found himself being pushed and hustled into an odd-looking vehicle with stars painted all over the side. "Um ... where did this thing come from?" he asked, confused as he and the Solar Squad entered the interior of the space truck. It looked like a pretty normal truck on the inside, apart from a few bizarre features that need not be mentioned at this point. "Oh, we just had an invisibility field over it," Chriss answered airily, stalking over to climb into the driver's seat from the back. "Ah ... I see." Damien's stomach rumbled. He was hungry. "Isn't there any ramen around?" he asked, speaking the name of what he considered as the best food in the world. "Excuse me?" Pii asked politely. "Some ... what?" "Rah-men," Leslier said, quickly scanning Damien's mind. "Best food in the world, according to him. White strips soaked in oily water, along with some other stuff. Apparently comes from the country named Japan."

Names to choose from for Round Four: _jade_em_, _jaye_, Jasujo, Jellyfish72, jellyoflight, meowth1982, xjox Answers at the bottom of the page

ROUND FIVE

Part 17 "Sorry we don't stock Rahmen" Pii said still unsure of what it was. The van shook all of a sudden. Damien quickly looked out of the window and saw that he was no longer on earth, he was in space, and the van had turned into a small flying saucer. "Where are we going?" he asked the owls who had now abducted him. "To meet the Pink poodle... and his toy!"

Part 18 Damien had to sit down. He found the nearest chair. It was blue. He sat in it. He tried to catch his breath. It took a while. The owls watched his discomfort. They saw he was uncomfortable. It made them uncomfortable to see him so discomforted. But they continued to watch. Uncomfortably. Soon, Damien caught his breath. His breath was caught. The owls watched the renewed comfort. They knew that before they continued they had to tell him something. There was something they had to tell him before they could go on. Before they could go on, he had to be told something by them. "Damien", they said turning to him and speaking to him as they turned toward him and spoke. "We need to speak to you because there is something we need to speak about." They started the speaking.

Part 19 The owl said "I know how to get you back home." This was great news to Damien. "Why how can I go back to earth and to my home?" "Well actually all you have to do is snap your black shoes twice and mutter the words "There is no place like HOME" So Damien muttered the words and off he went back zooming back to earth.

Part 20 However, instead of saying "Home" like he meant to Damien accidentally blurted out "There's no place like Nome." Thus as he zoomed back to earth, but instead of arriving in the sunny hills of his home town, he landed on the top of a snow bank on the out skirts of Nome, Alaska. He was about to walk into the town when he hear a strange noise, turning around he saw a giant polar bear, it was larger than Chiazilla with teeth the size of full grown man and claws the size of a large cow. Damien turned to run, only to trip on his shoelace and fall flat on his face, he turn around in fright-only to see the monster polar bear prepare to make a lunge at the small human who had found his way into its path...

Names to choose from for Round Five: .:Chronically Depressed:., Blk Mage, Christopher, coming2atvnearu, sirclucky, the_dog_god, sir_michael Answers at the bottom of the page

ROUND SIX

Part 21 Damien cowered in terror, expecting to be ripped to shreds any second now. But one second passed, and another, and another. Soon a full ten seconds passed and he didn't feel the cow sized claws digging into his flesh. He peeked out between his fingers and was blinded by intense white light. As his eyes slowly adjusted he realized he was no longer in Nome, Alaska. He was in a large, white hall that simply exuded brilliant light from every crevice. He stood up and slowly turned around to face Linda laughing her owl tail feathers off. "You... *lol* ... actually thought... *lol* that you were... in NOME! *roflol* And... and... *lol* ...you thought a... *lol* ...a 30 meter polar bear *giggle* was attacking you!" Damien blushed fierce rouge and tried to stammer a response but was interrupted by Linda. "And it was only a IV machine! (Image Viewer) *giggle* *snicker* Well now that we've had some fun with you, you said you wanted to go home. The pink poodle is waiting for you in the next room. They should be able to guide you further." Linda flapped her wing to the left and Damien realized that there was a dim shadow outlining a doorway.

Part 22 Damien's eyes widened in terror. Pink poodles?! They were what he feared most! They always lurked in the shadows, waiting with their little beady eyes... staring at him... He bit his lip, trying to think thoughts of pain and not terror. After all, his mother had always told him to eat his green veggies! But thoughts of green veggies always reminded him of Popeye. And Popeye always reminded him of spinach. And spinach always reminded him of... "Stop it!" Pii shrieked out. "You're confusing us." With a nod, Damien stepped through the door to face the Pink Poodle.

Part 23 "Hello, Son," said a familiar voice as he entered the room. The light was too bright so he couldn't see until his eyes adjusted. "Who . . .who are you?" He raised his hand to shield his eyes. As they adjusted to the light, he saw the being in front of him more clearly and took a step forward. "Mom??" "Yes, Son. It's me. I was hoping it wouldn't come to this, but I guess you are just too persistent." The creature stood in front of him. It looked like his mother, but odd in a way. She now had pink poofy hair and was wearing a sleek, pink bodysuit of some sort with poofy pinkness around her wrists and ankles. A crystal glowed on a chain around her neck. "Come to this? What do you mean?" Damien didn't move further because he was still in shock. "I tried to defeat you before but your helmet protected you. I used my acid lick ability, but the power in your helmet absorbed it and just left it pink. You must not be allowed to live. Our plan of world domination must follow through!" "Dad gave me this helmet," Damien thought and raised a hand to touch it lightly. Everything started to sink in. He turned to run out of the room only to find the door shut and locked behind him. The Mother laughed evilly. "You thought you could get away so easily?" A double-sided pink light saber extended from a metallic wand in her hand and she threw one to the Son. "Enough with this chatter. Let us battle." With that she demonstrated some wondrous moves with her saber and looked to him, seeming to say "Bring it on." Damien had no choice. He swallowed back his fear, extended his light saber, and raced towards the being that had been his mother. Tears flew from his eyes as courage enveloped his heart. With one battle cry, the fight began. "You will not destroy my Earth!!"

Part 24 Damien could feel his heart pounding in his throat. His palms began to sweat as he lunged towards the creature. The more his eyes fixated on it's figure the more distorted his mother's face appeared. She delicately swung her saber at him, he jumped back but not far enough. The saber's tip steamed as it cut into his ankle. Damien stumbled a bit, gasping in shock. Again, he lurched forward flailing the light saber about. The creature laughed. "Is this the best you can do? I'd have expected more from you, Damien. You're protecting your world aren't you? Make this worth my while." Damien stepped back again, his eyes were swollen with tears. "What am I supposed to do?" The creature was different now. Her pink hair was darker and tips of red horns were visible beneath the massive curls a top her head. "A demon!" Damien sputtered. He dropped the saber and fell to the floor. "What if I can't do this?" He was scared. Damien pressed his face into his hands. He could hear loud footsteps approaching him. He peeked between his slender fingers and saw the shadow of the creature getting closer. It bent over before him with its long fingers resting on his head. "If you just give up I won't hurt you." The crystal necklace around its neck dangled in front of Damien's face. His hand instinctively reached up and grabbed it. He pulled as hard as he could snapping the thin chain. The creature stared in amazement it's face changing into that of a distorted and withered man. "How.. how could this happen? I'm supposed to beat you!" It dug its nails into Damien's head lifting him up from the floor. Damien struggled to get away from it. He opened his mouth, a shrill scream escaping his lips. "Let me go! Put me down!" The creature’s body began to shrivel. It's arm shook and swayed as it tried to support Damien's body. Suddenly, a bright flash engulfed the room and the creature was gone, leaving only a pile of brown ashes. Its decomposing hand was still clutching Damien's head. He shrieked, batting at the hand, and shaking it free from his head. He backed away from the ashes, pressing his back against the cold cement wall behind him. "Is it over? This was far too easy." He sunk to the floor and pulled his knees to his chest. He was exhausted. He had been through so much. How could it be over already? He closed his eyes and rested his head against the wall. Damien stirred, he could feel sunlight on his face and his mother's voice booming from beneath him. "Get out of bed! Damien, this is ridiculous. You'll be late!" His eyes shot open. He was in his bed, thick blankets wrapped around him. Sunlight poured into his bedroom. He looked around in disbelief. "Was I dreaming? Wow..." He hopped out of bed and began looking for his jeans. He turned quickly, a sharp pain shot through his leg and he fell back onto the bed. A thin stream of blood ran from a gash in his ankle. He gasped, staring at the wound, "But... how?" A shadow crept across the floor, Damien winced and slowly looked up. Perched on his windowsill was a small, but fat brown owl. "L..Linda?" It tilted its head and pressed its beak against the glass. "You're a brave boy. A warrior. It's a shame no one else will ever know what you've done for them. You're this planet's savior." The owl extended its wings, the window shook. Damien leaped up and ran towards the window, but it was gone. He squinted, searching the sky, but he could barely see the owl's figure fading in the distance.

Names to choose from for Round Six: Anubis, hyperflutterby, Jasujo, r4che1, robot, Twizzler0171, tymaporer Answers at the bottom of the page

Answer Key:

1. Yoshi

2. Blk Mage

3. the_dog_god

4. coming2atvnearu1.

5. tymaporer

6. r4che1

7. Twizzler0171

8. ...Alex

9. Qanda

10. ScottNak

11. timkhj

12. Xil

13. meowth1982

14. Jellyfish72

15. jellyoflight

16. _jade_em_

17. .:Chronically Depressed:.

18. coming2atvnearu

19. Blk Mage

20. sirclucky

21. hyperflutterby

22. Twizzler0171

23. Jasujo

24. robot

Got a lot of 'em right? Maybe you should try participating in the next round if we hold one, where we'll probably be starting a new story! Stay tuned to the Guys and Divas user groups!

Note: Thanks goes to fzun for making the icon! Sources used for the icon, if any, are not credited. Thanks also goes to Xil for helping with the table coding. Yoshi compiled this month’s article.